Well, other than an uninspired title. Is this Eddie Murphy’s comeback? Or just another shit sandwich of a movie? Embedded below you will find the trailer for today’s discussion Tower Heist. Please scroll down and watch it. No, I’ll wait.

Caught up now? Great! Let’s begin.

What the hell? I cannot begin to describe how I feel about that preview or the prospect of the subsequent movie. No, I really can’t. I saw this trailer with Digger in front of Cowboys & Aliens and I had never heard of it before. Immediately after, I wondered if this was a comedy, drama, or absurdest tale like Daddy Day Care.

First thing: does Hollywood really think plastering Brett Ratner’s name on a trailer is a draw? You can apparently only say “From the director of Dark Knight” about Nolan but Ratner and his shenanigans get a pass? Fuck that.

Second thing: really, is this supposed to be a comedy? Because it was not funny. I would be more apt to see it if it had a sorta-black humor quality to it and if it were played as a straight-up heist movie, I might actually be sort of excited. Sadly, the trailer (probably like the movie) does not know what the hell genre to portray and thus it is all over the place.

Third thing: Can Eddie Murphy just go away? Pretty please with sugar on top? You needn’t have more example why than the embedded video below.

Fourth thing: Can Matthew Broderick get some decent roles with the hopeful retirement of Eddie Murphy? Lest we forget he was Ferris Bueller. And damn excellent in Election.

Last thing: Why the hell is this trailer almost three minutes long? If this is a 90 minute movie, then we have seen almost 5% of its entirety. Did they need more time to show up just how lousy this thing will be?